Really lovely simple things:

The smell of the rain

Driving with the windows down

Laughing so hard you can't breath

Inside jokes

Singing a worship song that relates perfectly to what God is teaching you

Fresh bright tulips

Water rapids rides

Tazo tea with a friend

Painting ceramic pieces

Someone praying for you

Canoeing with my sister

Running on the beach with the sweet sea air

Hammocks

Cute little grandmothers

Sharing food

Seeing someone rededicate his/her life to Christ

Reunions

Birds singing

Mozzarella cheese sticks

Finding perfect sea shells

My heart is

full... 

God is taking me to Africa.
Flight tickets bought, bags just about packed, countless prayers prayed, hugs given, phone calls made, letters sent, surprises prepared, conferences attended...
2 days ago I got this e-mail and talked to my dad on the phone.  There was suddenly a possibility the trip was off.  My heart was stricken.  Lies haunted me- God does not want to use me.  I am never going to be good enough.  Lies multiplied.
Then I just had a peace.  I knew the truth.  NO MATTER IF I WAS ABLE TO TAKE THE TRIP OR NOT, GOD LOVED ME.  If He was going to close that door, it was only because He was going to open another one.  Still, I felt such a strong calling to go.  Why would God call me and prepare me and put the pieces completely in place to abandon me?  My God is faithful.  He has steadfast love.  He will not leave me.  And He didn't.
I started reading Psalm 91 and dwelled on God's promises.  And you know what? He kept His promise!  
Tomorrow God is going to begin to stretch my faith in a completely new way as I embark on a trip to Africa.  I will be sure to keep you updated on the adventure as well as I can.   All I know is that these words cannot do justice to the overwhelming joy in my heart.  God has not abandoned me or found me useless.  He wants me to shine for Him on another continent.   


As I look back on my Freshman year of college, God never once left my side!  He was there during the good, bad, mundane, and joyous.  He was there and it was His will.  My heart is full. 

This Good Day.

"Living a life of faith means never knowing where you are being led. But it does mean loving and knowing the One who is leading..."

~O.C.

I'm afraid but I'm brave.  

God is leading me to some breath-taking places over the next few months and I want to be ready.

Meanwhile, I am just savoring this good day.  It consists of common tasks and future preparation.  Today was a day of prayer, learning arabic, memorizing Bible verses, running miles, Chinese food with Mom, baking cookies, going swimming, reading about world missions, painting, doing laundry and dishes, and a long lovely chat with my sister.  I praise God for yesterday's life lived, for today's moments to cherish, and tomorrow's hopes that overwhelm me with peace.

"Ebenezer" Stones.

1 Samuel 7:12- "Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen and called its name Ebenezer; for he said, 'Till now the LORD has helped us.'”  

Joshua 4:19-20- "The people came up out of the Jordan on the tenth day of the first month, and they encamped at Gilgal on the east border of Jericho. And those twelve stones, which they took out of the Jordan, Joshua set up at Gilgal."

Today my pastor talked about Joshua and the memorial he set up by the Jordan river.  It was for the Israelites to remember all God had done for them.  This made me contemplate... What 12 "ebenezer" stones do I have in my life?  What 12 memories/places where God showed up can I treasure in my heart as I trust He will continue to do great things.  These words, phrases, places, listed below, are my memorial stones, of when God came through.

[I am nothing.  Everyday.  John 16:33.  To obey is better than sacrifice.  I was captivated.  "bEHOLD, LIKE THE CLAY IN THE POTTER'S HAND, SO ARE YOU IN MY HAND, o HOUSE OF iSRAEL."  In San Felipe. Be still and know that He is God.  I was deferred but He wasn't. prayers answered.  Your Love is a Song. A BIBLE.]

Let your light shine down on me.

"But the path of the righeous is like the light of dawn,

which shines brighter and brighter until full day."

Proverbs 4:18

It's been unpredictable.

This past week was completely busy and hectic.  But I loved it, especially the unexpected moments it brought...

Meeting people online is always interesting.

But this week I had the opportunity to video chat with some of my online college classmates.

The verdict: they are some pretty amazing people!

Yes, it was different talking online...

Especially when these people are in different time zones and everything.

But it makes me excited for next year when I will actually go to college with these awesome people.

Seeing God change a school

See you at the pole was Wednesday and since I'm in college, I went my one friend to her public school to pray around her flagpool. 

Even though it ended up only being three of us, it was so great for me.

To be brave and obedient to God, by going into this school and taking a stand for Christ meant so much to me.

Plus, that high school is now going to start a Christian ministry group.

Those prayers we prayed were only the beginning!

Running into people from Class of '11

That night at college ministry, I sat with some good friends for the service.

Then on the way out I ran into some other of my high school classmates.

It made me so joyful to see them still around, seeking to know God and grow closer to Him.

All those prayers I prayed in high school for them are not in vain.

Spending time with a friend like old times

The next day I got the chance to take a break from classes and have a lunch date with my dear friend I've known since I was little.

It was so great to hear how her senior year is going and also hear how she is waiting on God's guidance for college.

She also is continuing to faithfully lead a prayer group at my church.

As we both enjoyed chick-fil-a, I was encouraged by her joyful faith in God during this time in her life.

My new job is growing on me more and more as I get to know the people who work there.

They are all so nice and encouraging!

I was blessed enough to get treated to lunch on Thursday by my manager.

And I am blessed to work hard to earn money for college, clothes, and missions trips.

Overwhelming Encouragement

On Friday I got to eat lunch with my high school guidance counselor.

She truly must be filled with the Holy Spirit to give such godly and perfect advice.

It was so lovely to just update her about my life and take in her encouragement.

Art again

Since I was around, I also ran over to the art room.

It felt so good to be back in that class room and thinking creatively rather than just spending time reading and analyzing.

My art teacher helped me gather some supplies so I can do more artwork on my own. 

Now, Golden Acres was tough this week and I got pretty discouraged.

Thankfully, I talked to some friends who reminded me that we are not serving in vain.

The past few weeks before had been so wonderful.

Yet, sometimes we just don't see the fruit of out labor.

And that reminds me, it's not my labor in that community anyways, it's God's.

I still have faith He will continue to show up there!

And I'll swim the ocean for you...

You and your wide-eyed dreams...

{I want to watch a sunrise in Africa}

{Walk around NYC}

{Attend a Hillsong United Concert}

{Go ice-skating in Chicago}

{Eat fair-trade chocolate}

{Learn to speak Greek}

{Write a book}

{Smile and make someone's day}

{Watch all the movie classics}

{Drink Chai tea and look at the stars}

{Run 4 miles in a row}

{Parasail}

{Climb a water tower}

{Go to David Platt's church}

{Run through a field of sunflowers}

Yet what I desire more than these dreams is God's will.

"But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ."

Philippians 3:7

15 Things I love this Summer:

1. My new Bible for all my college notes.  Original Dilemma: Finding a Bible in NAS or ESV that is small, durable, but with sufficient margin space for Bible College notes.  Problem solved!


2. In the search for the perfect bedding for college, I found this lovely, unique blanket at Urban Outfitters.  But $249...?  I don't think so.  Still, I love it!

3. Following these wonderful bloggers:
My sister: throughthewatersoflife.blogspot.com/
My sweet friend in Chi-town: daniellegermaine.tumblr.com/post/8030505714/lists-lists-lists
As well as working on the blog for my church's high school outreach: liquidoutreachmissions.wordpress.com/

4. The Red TOMS I just got in the mail last week. Perfect.


5. Compassion International keeps showing up everywhere so it seems! But I'm absolutely falling in love with this organization.


6. The following movies are my absolute favorites.  I tried to make a list of 10 but couldn't choose, so there are 15 (in no particular order).

Pearl Harbor

Remember the Titans

Julie and Julia

(500) Days of Summer

We're all in This Together Hillsong United Documentary

Ratatoille

The Lake House

Slumdog Millionaire

Princess Bride

Mr. Smith Goes to Washington

The Blind Side

The End of the Spear

August Rush

Clueless

Get Smart

7. Nike Training Club workouts.  I love to do a 15 minute workout while watching Cake Boss, ironically.

8. National Geographic magazine has been something I love getting in the mail each month.  I also am always blown away by their website and "photos of the day." Nearly all the pictures for this blog I get from their website...

9. I've been praying through Operation World for about 8 months now and I discovered their prayercast videos recently.  They're pretty amazing! www.operationworld.org/prayer-videos

10.  These bobby pins from Etsy are absolutely gorgeous... But I'm tentative about paying so much...

11.  I'm not completely convinced about the whole "hipster" craze going on.  However, I saw these polaroid notes and thought they would be so great to write notes on to my friends away in college.

12.  Last summer I had a lot of time (and airplane rides) during which to read.  This summer, I've tried to keep up the tradition but I haven't made near as much progress.  Nonetheless, my summer reading list has included:

Under the Overpass by Mike Yankoski

The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer

Things I Wish I'd Known Before we got Married by Gary Chapman

D.L. Moody by Kevin Belmonte

Fresh Faith by Jim Cymbala

Wild at Heart by John Eldredge

And Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis

13.  I got back my AP scores and I passed A.P. Studio art... I've framed a few of my Greek Concentration pieces and can't wait to put them up in my room!

14.  I saw this bag and FEED seems to be doing a lot of good things for those who are impoverished, so I'm considering buying it. ae.com/web/browse/product.jspproductId=0427_7510_131&catId=cat4840018

15.  My Utmost for His Highest has been sitting on my shelf for a year now and I've read it every now and then.  I can't wait to start reading it daily with my friends who are going off to college. 

"I wish that we could sail our sad days away, forever, in deep blue seas of paper maché."

Remember:

{I opened your christmas presents for you}

{We went tubing on the Meramec}

{We stared in amazement at the flying fish in the middle of the ocean}

{Isn't it nice to know the lining is silver?}

{We rode donkeys up a cobblestone path to Greek ruins}

{Our late-night talks}

{We had every song in Aristocats memorized}

{Bike rides in the winter}

{That time we made empanadas together}

{We waded in the ocean at Mykonos}

{You always pressuring me to go on all the rollercoasters}

{Setting up the town at Christmastime}

{We would swing in the backyard}

{Ella Fitzgerald's music}

"There's no better friend than a sister and there's no better sister than you."

So whether it's during the hardest time ever or these cherished moments, I'm thankful to know I'm not alone.

Breathless Expectation.

"Gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life. To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways, not knowing what tomorrow may bring. This is generally expressed with a sigh of sadness but it should be an expression of breathless expectation.”

~Oswald Chambers

As high school comes to an end in three weeks, a new time in my life is coming.  What will happen? So little is set in stone right now.  A year ago, I would have worried and panicked. However, now I am embracing the opportunities I have. I could:

*Go to Uganda for a couple months for an internship

*Or maybe go with my sister to Haiti for a week

*Or help to the write the bible study curriculum for the kids at GA

*Or do make more mixed media pieces and collections

*Or learn to speak more spanish

*Or study art history

*Or go to college church with some of friends staying local for college

*Or buy a car

*Or learn to cook

*Or get an internship at my church or another non-profit

*Or work at Starbucks

*Or go back to Mexico with my sister's grade

*Or maybe help plan a mission trip

*Or visit my relatives in Missouri and help my grandma

*Or go on a mission trip with Operation Mobilization

What Lord? Where Lord? I'm waiting here in breathless expectation.

Never Forget.

You only get to have Senior skip day once.  And mine would turn out like this...

*My friend and I went to the beach and it started pouring rain as soon as we got there.  We had to pay $10 for parking and then we stood beneath this pavilion for 15 minutes praying that the hurricane would let up, but it didn't. 
*So we headed back to the parked car and I almost flew away like Mary Poppins with the umbrella.  Then my friend managed to back up her car into a pole. 
*After we got out of that parking garage, we drove through the monsoon to Chick-fil-a where we managed to have a great lunch and then it stopped storming.
*However, with gray skies still overhead, we drove over to Pier 1 Imports and found all kinds of unnecessary but pretty items like a giant spatula, frog statues, and chip clips shaped like alligators.
*After walking around a disappointing outdoor mall, we started driving again, heading nowhere.
*We finally decided to go to another beach but since we only have fifteen minutes, we browsed the tourist shops.

So senior skip day did not go exactly as planned, but you know what? Some moments made me laugh so hard, I don't think I will ever forget.

17

The seventeen most worthwhile and memorable moments of my 17th year:

1) Getting my driver's license last March
2) Waking up early to watch the sunrise on Easter morning
3) Finishing AP U.S. History
4) Going to Prom, even though I wasn't going to go at first, but in the end had a wonderful time
5) Watching God work on Mexico Missions trip!  And having a "captivating" moment when I saw 360 degree blue sky :)
6) Traveling to Athens and the Greek Islands and reading the book of Acts at the same time.
7) The fireworks mishap my family had while in Missouri
8) Becoming involved in the Golden Acres community, building relationships with the kids there, and seeing them grow closer to Christ
9) Going to Chicago, Illinois and praying outside Navy Pier under the stars
10) Learning to "Be still and know that He is God" when I got pneumonia
11) Applying to college and talking to my classmates about their college plans
12) Watching my Senior class win the homecoming competition- Finally!
13) Worshipping God at the Phil Wickham concert
14) Celebrating my friends birthday at Cheesecake, taking pictures, and running to Pageant
15) Deleting my facebook for 2 months so I could spend more time with God
16) Winning an award for an art piece that was completely for God's glory and now could go to New York
17) Growing closer to God through struggles, having good friends to depend on, sharing fun memories like Candy Grams, and becoming more and more who God is calling me to be.

Swan Princess Years.

Some of the best memories from my younger years were at a golf course.  My mom was a stay-at-home mom but an avid golfer and my sister and I would always tag along.  I still remember the early morning dew on the green stubby grass.  I can see my sister and I sitting in the shade of the golf cart or playing on the putting green.  Then there were the days when my mom decided my sister and I should learn to play golf and she bought us miniature golf clubs and colorful golf balls.  It never excited us like it did for her.  She would throw out incentives but our fascination for golf could not be inspired.  We would rather hang out in the golf clubhouse or beg her to drive the golf cart. 

These memories all swarmed back to me when I found out that my senior prom is at the golf course my parents were first members.  I remember walking by the fountains and staring at the staircase in awe at of the events held there.  Now I get to go back to this location where I spent so many childhood memories, and have some of the concluding memories of my senior year there.  It's just a little blessing for me :)

Enchanted.

http://owlcitymusic.com/vday/

Be mine ;)

There's something about this funny holiday called Valentine's Day.  My perspective on it seems to change each year.  I've gone from day-dreamer to cynic to romantic to indifferent to today, just plain loving the day.  Valentine 's Day celebration at my school began with a scavenger hunt race this past Friday.  If you know my school, you can just see the students running all around, through all the halls and classrooms, and occasionally colliding.  Then today was CANDY GRAMS!!! woot woot!  Combine most of a senior class, red and pink clothes including tutus, an elementary school, candy bags, a handheld stereo, musical instruments, and the songs "Baby," "Firework," and "You belong with me;" let's just say today was incredible.  Although I am a little tired of the Beiber songs running through my head.

Riding into the Sunset.

Sunsets over highways.
Yesterday, driving home from Golden Acres outreach, it looked like someone had painted streaks of pink and orange across the sky.  Admiring that sunset just gave me one more reasurrence that God is faithful and in control.  I saw God work yesterday in some pretty great ways and that sunset was just the cherry on top.  I have a peace right now that I can't understand.

When it strikes midnight.
Tonight is my sister's sweet 16.  She is beyond excited and so am I for her.  I pray that she will be swept off her feet.  I hope that this event will not allow her to lose perspective, but see how deeply she is loved.  Because she really is.

"I hope that you've had a good time on your trip to Mexico. I prayed a lot so God would bless you."

The other day I got a couple letters from my Compassion kids and I almost started crying when I read one of the letters.  The young boy I sponsor in Dominican Republic wrote to me about he had been praying for my Mexico missions trip back in June.  It meant so much.  I love prayer. God can hear my cries as I pray through Operation World each day and for my classmates at school.  He can hear my little compassion child praying for my missions trip. Prayer draws us closer to God and at the same time unites His believers around the world.  I love it.

Last Semester.

The orchid on the art table in my room finally died today.  Today is also the last day of Christmas break and I'm about to head into the last semester of high school.  It's crazy, really. 

Change is something strange.
So is the end of a journey.

During this break, I went with my whole family to see the movie The Voyage of the Dawn Treader.  It was so weird to go see the movie together.  Normally I always see movies with my friends or my sister.  But no, it was my whole family.  And the movie reminded me of past times too, because I read the book in elementary school.  It was my favorite of the Narnia books.  You can tell I definitely had an imagination.  Anyways, I go to see the movie, and when it gets to the end, Lucy and Edmund are sent back from Narnia for the final time.  There's no going back.  Strangely, I relate to them, despite the fact they are fictional characters in a fantasy world.  One more semester, and I'm done with high school.  No more seeing these same familiar faces.  I leave this usual sphere and head off somewhere new.  How can I make the most of these moments?

I want to reach out to my grade, hear their dreams, contribute to their hopes, be a light.
I want to go on more afternoon bike rides with my sister and watch more chick-flick movies with her.
I want to help my mom more in the kitchen and run more errands with her.
I want to eat more ice cream with my dad.
I want to run three miles more often.
I want to pray every day through Operation World.
I don't want to have too many plans.  I want to be whimful.
and joyful.  and hopeful. and loveful. and graceful.
I want to make God's dreams my own.
I want to embrace this last semester and be immune to senioritis.
I'm not kidding! :)

Merry Christmas To You!