In Full Assurance of Faith.

Today was not quite as painful as I thought it would be.  I had a great talk with my guidance counselor that really encouraged me.  Then I went to art class where my teacher placed a tiny mustard seed in my hand and asked me if I had faith that size.  After Art, small groups was a chance for me to be vulnerable and honest because I am not perfect and neither is my life, especially right now.  My friend lead small group today and brought up verses about encouragement and fellowship.  I read this one and it stood out to me:

"Therefore, brethren, having boldness to enter the Holiest by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way which He consecrated for us, through the veil, that is, His flesh, and having a High Priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful. And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works, not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some, but exhorting one another, and so much the more as you see the Day approaching." Hebrews 10:19-25

I'm not alone at this time.  I have the support of countless friends, mentors, and family.  God will take me wherever He wants me for college and I will glorify Him no matter where that is.  My sister told me tonight that I just need to fully surrender the situation to God and not carry the burden anymore.  Very little is in my control and very much is in His.  He sees the big picture and knows what's best, even though I can't see it right now.  Nothing better can be done than a full surrender to Him at this time.

I wish facing trials was as easy as writing this blog entry.  It's not so.  I think maybe if I stop thinking so much about myself and focus on others more, then maybe I can gain some perspective and realize how small my problems are.  I am not the main character of this story, God is.